A Religious Funeral Service
A Religious
Funeral Service
Much is written these days on alternatives and
extremes. We read regularly about ‘extreme terrorism,’ sometimes in the name of
“Allah!”
We read of the ‘extreme’ exploits of migrants
attempting to escape their own political systems and drowning in their efforts
– literally!
We also regularly witness, ‘alternative’ funeral
services.
“Is the Christian funeral service a thing of the
past?”
Younger generations don’t attend many ‘senior’ funeral
services. Once in a while, a young death occurs due to an accident, suicide or
illness. These are extremely well-attended and frequently, do not include a
church minister to officiate. But, let’s not lose sight of the purpose of the
funeral service.
We can ‘water-down’ anything we want these days. We
live in such transient times that people do not considering longevity. True,
our mortality is part of that longevity and rarely considered after all, it is
such a long way off – right? Not for the young person whose funeral we just
attended!
For there to be ‘alternative’ celebrants to conduct
funeral services, there first had to be a ‘norm’ or, standard practice. By law,
in England and Wales, the Church of England gives everybody the right to a
funeral service be it burial or cremation. This is not the same as, disposing
of a body.
Whether the death occurs in hospital or not, either
the hospital authority or the local (council) authority IS responsible for the
disposal if no other means is available BUT, the actual service IS the
responsibility of the Church of England.
Irrespective of the fees involved, the whole purpose
is a preparation for ‘life’ after mortal death – spiritual life in heaven (or
hell!).
To many of us, this conundrum has been present in our
lives since birth.
Growing up and attending school and ‘Sunday School’ in
the 50’s and 60’s; attending compulsory ‘Church Parades’ in the army, I learnt
that my Christening or, Baptism, was a temporary state of, ‘God’s Blessing’
until such time as my god-parents, those three people responsible for my
religious education (in addition to other sources - not those commissioned to
take care of me if my parents were killed in a car accident!), handed the
choice and responsibility back to me to commit myself to the church by being
‘confirmed’ at the approximate age of 13 to 14 years.
Of course, I learnt a lot of this after the events (my God-parents obviously failed me!).
‘Confirmation’ to me was a number of sessions in my
army life which enabled me to miss (skive) other unpleasantries of HM discipline!
This did culminate in a ‘parent-attended’ ceremony AND, enabled me to go up to
the altar (well almost up to), and partake of the ‘bread and wine’ symbolism –
Holy Communion – a symbolic sharing of The last Supper with Jesus (God
incarnate).
Little did anyone know, I had received this privilege
twice.
When I was born, I contracted (yellow) jaundice. So
serious was the condition, my mother (who had rescinded her Roman Catholicism
to marry my Church of England father???), was visited by a Roman Catholic priest,
in hospital where, I presumable received my ‘last rites’ – I was certainly
blessed into ‘God’s waiting room’ but, survived the illness as you now know.
Having also been through total immersion baptism in my
adult life following my father’s death, I have some ground-works in place
regarding religion. Truthfully, I believe in God. Do I have answers to
questions regarding the ‘next’ life? Only what I read and have been taught from
The Bible.
In my time as a funeral director, speaking and
becoming known personally to families, I have, on odd occasions, conducted
funeral services. I have encountered ministers who would NOT conduct the
funeral service of a gay person - more than once; – I have been asked to
step-in mostly before the practices of engaging a funeral celebrant whose remit
or brief is somewhat different in truth – essentially they do not cater for the
afterlife.
Often, I have completed the process started by the
clergy when interring (burying) ashes or, cremated remains, almost entirely
with religious wording, prayers, The Lord’s Prayer and The Grace. I do this
with conviction because of my own belief in God; I couldn’t do it without that
belief.
The purpose of the Christian funeral service has been
altered – slightly. Why? I imagine to ‘accommodate’ people? The church today
has to compromise for numerous reasons; whether that is right or wrong is not
for my judgement. Jesus did NOT compromise! He did not bear false witness, He
did not succumb to temptation He did not deny His Father in heaven – He was not
a sinner – ‘man’, unfortunately does not hold the same standards – fact.
The church has fallen foul of, ’The Celebration of
Life.’ Not necessarily a bad thing but not quite the purpose of the Christian
ceremony. Recalling the good and nice things the deceased accomplished in life
is comforting: heaven or hell? Not so good!
We often hear that funerals are for the living and not
the dead? To bring comfort and minimalise our grief is no bad thing,
practically, but really? How does that prepare us for our ‘spiritual life’
after death?
In the absence of evidence or facts relating to our
‘good works’ here on Earth, the minister beseeches God for His mercy on the
soul of the departed, asks for forgiveness for all the misdeeds committed,
pleads the defence case here on Earth for the mortal that is departing our
presence and though the minister has no knowledge necessarily, regarding the
deceased, he/she, pleads for absolution before that all-important, meeting with
the maker!
Commending them into God’s Loving Care as opposed to
casting them into the Fire and Brimstone of the past, and with hardly a mention
of the word sinner, the journey begins for the deceased and hopefully
(once-upon-a-time with his coin for The
Ferryman on his chest), the curtain comes round or we lower the deceased
into the ground and bless the people in attendance too!
It is so strange to watch people’s comfort levels in
the UK with their apparent dismissal of God in their lives, in stark contrast to so much of the rest of the
world who ‘cross’ themselves at every opportunity they can and ask for God’s
blessing even as they compete in sport – as do the other side!
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